Fairy Tale Dreams – Part 1

She’s got her head in the clouds, dreaming of some far away place, where everything is perfectly romantic. The weather is lovely at just the right time of year, mountains and rivers near by and, of course, a rocky stream flows through the property. A loving husband, dogs, a cat and family all fit nicely into this fairy tale world.

Head in the clouds. That is what many people I know would say about me. I have spent years dreaming of the moment when this kind of fairy tale life could come true for me. My home, a three bedroom, two bath, tract home in a 1980’s master planned community, just doesn’t quite fit the romantic notion I have had in the back of my mind for years. I do have the loving husband, dogs, cat and family. My home is safe, warm and cozy. No mountains or streams and the weather where I live is far from idyllic. Deep down I know that I would not trade what I do have for those other things. Besides, is there really such a thing as idyllic weather? Well, yes…but not all the time and there are huge trade offs for chasing that weather.

We came very close to trading all this in for what seemed to be the idyllic life somewhere else. It had all the requirements plus it fit into our budget. Could my dream really be coming true?

Heaven is Just a State Away

Arkansas has been on my radar for a few years. Our son-in-law has a family tradition of going camping on the Buffalo River every summer. Both of his parents have passed so he is working hard to keep the tradition alive. We were invited to go one year – though we didn’t go all the way to the Buffalo River which is close to the Missouri border – we did camp on the gorgeous Lake Ouachita. I have lived in Texas all of my adult life and have only driven through Arkansas on the way to somewhere else. This camping trip was an eye opening experience! It is one of the most beautiful states in the country. The state’s natural resources have been protected since the early 1900’s when the logging industry first arrived there. I was smitten. A seed was planted.

This past August my brother married in an incredibly beautiful location near Bentonville, Arkansas. While Bentonville is most commonly associated with the home of Sam Walton and Walmart, it is also a lovely city surrounded by forests and filled with small town charm. After the wedding John and I spent a few days in Mountain View on the White River. I was ready to live there the rest of my life. The beauty, the river, the mountains and forests, everything I love is there. Well, almost everything.

Celebrate and Dream

We went back to Mountain View in October. Our wedding anniversary is in October so we try to take a trip around that time every year. I wanted to see fall color, but this year didn’t want to go to New England; I wanted to go to Arkansas. Years of dreaming of living someplace different has taught me that I always fall in love with the places I go and before I know it I’m perusing Zillow to find my dream home. I wanted to see Arkansas through less rosy colored glasses to see if it is really all that my imagination made it out to be.

Mountain View is a charming little town filled with really nice people and is home to the Arkansas Craft School. Housed in a beautiful old stone building, artisan woodworkers, painters, jewelry makers, sculptors, and weavers all work at their craft. They have a gallery, teach workshops and classes and have a vocational type program to help anyone who wants to make the arts their career. I felt right at home.

Not only did I want to go to Arkansas again, I wanted to look for a place to live. The difference this time…John was just as interested as I was. Normally I am the dreamer and schemer, he keeps my feet grounded in reality. I admit that grounding has often felt like restriction and dream dashing, but the truth is I need someone who lives in realville to keep me from floating away.

While looking for property, John found the most beautiful townhome on a private lake in a gated community in Hot Springs Village.

We walked in the front door and were greeted to a view of the lake surrounded by trees with gold, orange and red leaves shimmering against a sapphire blue sky. It took our collective breaths away. Everything about this townhome was perfect including the fact that it comes furnished. All we would have to do is bring our clothes.

Too Much Thinking Can Be Counterproductive

We came home to think about it. I worried about the price. Yes, we can afford it now, but what about in the future? Could I really leave my home, daughter, and grandchildren? I couldn’t imagine it. I panicked. We did nothing. That townhome is still for sale. Is it waiting for us? I don’t know. But, what I do know is that fear is the enemy of faith. We weren’t even going to have to sell this house in order to purchase the this property.

We aren’t getting any younger. Our life here is not our own. At 75 and 65 we do not live alone; but this is a life we chose. Our oldest granddaughter came to live with us last year. She was at a crisis point and needed to live somewhere different. We would do anything, sacrifice anything for her. But…what if there was a way to have our life as we desire it and still nurture and support our college age granddaughter?

Could we really have our cake and eat it too?

I’m not sure.

Maybe.

What would it take?

More faith less fear?

Contentment In Waiting

Dreamers also tend to be chronic malcontents. At least that has been true for me. Nothing was ever quite right. I keep moving furniture, or buying new furniture; painting, redecorating, all in an attempt to capture whatever fantasy life I imagined at the moment. Let me tell you, that is no way to live. I either squashed the dreams in an attempt to keep the discontent away. If I don’t think about it, look at homes for sale, or even check the weather in another part of the country then I could be content…or so I thought.

Next time I will tell you the story of what happened when I adjusted the lens through which I saw my life.